Defuse a Situation With a Difficult Customer

Customer service can be difficult. Whether you work in food, retail, or hospitality, there are always going to be difficult situations with irritable, angry or upset customers. This article should help you deal with those situations in a professional, upbeat manner, so that the customer leaves satisfied, and you are not a nervous wreck at the end of it.


1. Bear in mind the importance of alleviating the concerns of an upset customer. An unhappy customer will spread the word about a bad experience with your store or business, including recommending that people not use your services, as well as looking for another supplier themselves. This means less money and less business for your company, with a strong possibility that at least a quarter of the disgruntled customers never deal with your business again. Equally, a customer who has experienced a bad experience being turned into a positive one will tell others about your company's sincerity and can-fix attitude.


2. Identify the problem. This may sound simple, but frequently problems with customers begin with simple misunderstandings on either or both sides. Make sure you fully understand what the customer's complaint is, and really listen to the complaint entirely. Don't interrupt, think defensively, or break in impatiently – the answer may be a lot simpler than it seems at first.

• Try to view the "problem" as a chance to excel. Customers with the highest levels of satisfaction tend to be those who have had a problem resolved openly and honestly, and who have felt acknowledged by the company, as well as being informed about what the company plans to do to ensure this type of problem won't happen again.
• Sometimes the "problem" may be as simple as the customer being miffed that you couldn't be bothered taking him to the place where the product is located, or you were content with stating that a product was "out of stock" but didn't offer to order in new stock. If this is the case, it's easily fixed - just order the item for him!

3. Identify your options in dealing with this problem. Make sure you are attentive to what the customer wants, and what you are realistically capable of doing to amend the situation. An apology is within everyone's capacity, no matter what your level in the company. If you hit a wall, or realize that to go any further would exceed your authority, apologize and refer the problem to your supervisor. Be sure to tell the customer what you're doing, and give him or her the name of your supervisor.

• If you need to keep the customer waiting while you fetch your supervisor, provide them with somewhere comfortable to wait. If you're authorized to offer refreshments such as water, then offer it. Being treated solicitously will calm down many aggrieved customers.

4. Keep a cool head and manner. Don't allow your customer's irritation and frustration to upset you. Put aside pride and the desire to put your ego before the customer's experience; while the temptation can be to make them feel that that you are right and they're not, resist this interpretation. The problem with thinking this way is that ultimately, you can't win because the customer will simply take their business elsewhere.

• Don't take the customer's strident tone, yelling, or whatever, personally. Instead, see this as an opportunity to be responsive, and to serve as the problem-solver. For example: "Let me have a look and see if I can figure out what happened. Bear with me, if you would, please... ah, okay, I see the problem. I can take care of this for you - I'm sorry for this. I know it's inconvenient and you had to come all the way back here, so I do apologize for that."

Note: In this example, you are sorry s/he had to come all the way back here and was put out. You did not apologize for the problem. Some people really have an issue with accepting responsibility for a problem they didn't cause. If you're one of them, this type of apology can be achieved with no insincerity - you certainly should be sorry that one of your customers had a problem caused by any of your staff. If you aren't, then you're probably going to be headed for a career change soon.

• If it is your fault, simply apologize calmly and sincerely - it does wonders to calm an angry person. If you simply own up to the problem and say something like, "Oh, no - this is my fault. I see where I goofed. I'm so sorry." Look the customer right in the eyes, and make sure your expression and tone of voice are sincere. It may also aid in defusing the situation if you "get the customer on your side," perhaps saying something like, "Oh boy, I hate it when we make mistakes like this. I'd be mad if I were you, too." You admit the problem is on your end (even if it wasn't actually you, but another staffer who caused the problem), and you validate the customer's frustration. This usually results in the customer now feeling some sympathy for you having to rectify the mistake.
• It's very unlikely that a customer will punch you for sincerity. However, residual upset is to be understood, and if you will allow your customer to do some grumping as you go about fixing the issue, it will help. The customer just needs to vent the frustration and upset. By the time all is done and you have brought the problem to a good resolution, the customer will very likely be bending over backwards to thank you.

5. Let the customer participate in solving the problem - within reasonable limits. If the customer is particularly difficult or upset because of an error or problem, ask directly, "What can I do to fix this that would honestly satisfy you?" These words can do wonders, as you have now made it clear to your customer that your goal is to satisfy him or her. Very often, they'll stammer something as simple as "I just want a new one", or "I just want this one fixed."


6. If the customer has a legitimate complaint, do everything within your power to amend the situation. If the customer's expectations are unrealistic or unfair, tell him or her so in a polite manner. The two examples following show how you might approach this:

• Example 1: A customer returns a damaged book, along with a receipt. Your store's policy is "no cash refunds", and you have another, undamaged copy of the book in stock. The customer loudly demands a cash refund, stating that they didn't like the book anyhow. Now you know that the customer has read the book, and there is very little chance the book was damaged when it left your store the first time - this customer is probably one of those labeled freeloaders or deadbeats. (Such people are always on the lookout for a free ride, and this one chose you.) You realize that this customer purchased a perfect book, took it home, read and enjoyed it, then dropped or purposely tore it, returned it to you, and now plans to go out and treat himself to a nice dinner - on your store. You have to decide, based on your store's policies, how to handle this. 1. Do you want to stand firm on your policy of no refunds, despite others watching and maybe feeling you are wrong to deny him a cash refund, even though your no refund policy is clearly posted? 2. Do you want to allow this customer to get away with it for the sake of appearing to be a no-hassle, great service shop in front of the other customers there?

Getaway: Let it go. You can inform him that your store's policy is no cash refunds, but in this case, you will make an exception. "However, sir," you warn, "in the future, all returns will be handled as exchange only. Is that understood?" Make sure he agrees to that before you hand him his money back. He won't be back. No big loss.


Stand firm. You: "I'm so sorry, sir, but I can't give you cash." Point at your sign (No Cash Refunds). If he complains, simply, calmly repeat over and over that you cannot. Alternate with an explanation, such as, "Sir, I wish we could, believe me, but there are copyright issues with books. Not that you would do this, but many people buy books in perfect condition, take them home, read them, realize they will never read them again, and so they drop kick them across their kitchen and then try to return them. Or they photocopy bits of them to keep. Either way, the copyright needs to be paid for. Once a book leaves our store, we consider it to be in perfect condition, and that is why no book may be returned for cash. You may exchange it, however. I have a replacement for you." If you do this, insist upon replacing it with the identical item - do not allow this customer to trade for something of equal value, or else you will be allowing this to happen over and over again, thereby giving this customer a whole lot of reading experiences for one low, low price. This customer does not need a book store - he needs a library.

• Example two: Mr. Dawson is irritated because he comes to your store each week to purchase comic books. He has given a list of items he does not want to miss out on to you, and you've agreed to pull and hold them aside for him when they come in. Unfortunately, one of your staff goofed and missed one. That, of course, is the one comic that sold out this week. It's selling for $10 in most places and Mr. Dawson is not a happy camper - he expected to get it for the cover price of $2.99. You are not responsible for the problem, but you're the one he comes to.

1. You: "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Dawson. I know this is sold out, but we can probably still get you a copy."
2. Mr. Dawson: "Not for less than $10! I come here every week! I'm a good customer! You should be more careful!"
3. You: "Yes, we should. I do apologize. Would you like me to see if I can get you a copy anyhow?"
4. Mr. Dawson: "Not for that much! I'll get it someplace else! In fact, maybe I'll just get all my comics someplace else."
5. You: "Oh, I hope not - you've been such a good customer, and we'd miss you. What can I do to make this right?"
6. Mr. Dawson: "Hmph. Well... I want that book, but not for $10."
7. You: "Okay. I can get it for you - it may take me a little time, but we'll just charge you cover price, no matter how much it costs us. Would that fix it for you? Could you be a little patient and give us time to find a copy for you?"
8. Mr. Dawson: "I suppose... But what about the nitwit who promised to hold it for me? I want him punished. It was that skinny kid who works here."
9. You: "I'll be sure to bring it up and let him know about the mistake."
10. Mr. Dawson: "Yeah, but that was serious! He needs to be taught a lesson! Maybe you should just let that guy go - otherwise, maybe I will go elsewhere after this."
11. You: "I know how upset you are, Mr. Dawson, and I'm doing everything I can to make you happy on this, but I'm not going to let him go. He's been a good employee, and he's only human. I'd hate to think how many jobs I'd have had by now if I'd been let go every time I forgot something for a customer. He made a mistake - I know this was a serious mistake, and it's going to cost me, that's for sure - but in the end,you will get your book, as promised - just a little late. I believe in my employee - we all make mistakes, and this was his turn. You can be certain I'm going to talk to him about it, but I'm not going to fire him - he's an honest guy who really cares about his customers. He's going to be disappointed to find out he made a mistake, and he'll punish himself over it more than I ever could. I appreciate your patience in letting us find you a new copy of that book, and we'll do our best not to miss another one."
12. In this last example, you made it clear how far you are willing to go. You point out that nobody's perfect, so you won't be firing anyone - that's going too far. But offering to go out and spend up to $10 to buy a book and then selling it to that customer for the promised price of $2.99 is a fair, reasonable thing to do, and all the pain is on the side that made the mistake. More than that is onerous, and you should not allow your customers to threaten or bully you into doing more than what is fair.

7. Don't allow situations to escalate. If your difficult situation escalates no matter how careful you've been, step in swiftly and decisively to put an end to the spiraling situation. Here is one example:

• Customer: "I've been waiting for this new Space Whizzers game for a month! It's going to be so >bleep< ing cool!"
• You: "Whoa - Language there!"
• Customer: "What? It's a free country. Freedom of speech."
• You: (look straight at him and shake your head) "We do not allow that kind of language in our store." At this point, the customer will most likely stop the objectionable behavior. If she or he doesn't, go one step further:
• Customer: "Hey, you're stepping on my civil rights. First Amendment." (Or, "I'll say whatever I @#%@# please" if you're not in the USA.)
• You: Step away from the cash register or whatever you're doing, with a smile, say "Excuse me," and go right over to the problem customer. Quietly, and as privately as possible, say: "Sir. We do not allow that type of language in our store. I'm asking you to stop. Please don't force me to ask you to leave."

8. Know how far to go. If the customer is engaged in objectionable behavior and has not stopped by this point, call store or mall security, or call 911 or emergency services in your country and ask the police to resolve it. Once aggression and aggravating behavior takes over on the customer's behalf, you have gone as far as you should, both for your sake, and for the sake of your other customers. Once you lift the receiver and the customer is aware that you're calling security or the police, she or he will probably leave on his or her own account.

• If a customer is drunk or under the influence of drugs, don't waste time trying to reason; call security immediately for the sake of everyone's safety and well-being.

Tips

1. Call your customer by name if possible. Everyone likes to hear his or her name, and just referring to the customer as Mr. or Ms. Customer can make a person feel like she or he is being heard.
2. Be sure to tell your boss the whole truth and nothing but the truth - don't try to hide or minimize anything you did. Just tell your boss right away if you have any problem with any customer, even if it was your fault. Chances are, your boss will be pleased you were able to handle it.
3. Remember that old saying, "The customer is always right?" Well, anyone who works with customers knows that isn't the case - however, the reality is, it's very hard to win an argument with a customer and many businesses now prefer to adopt the saying "Step 1. The customer is always right. Step 2. If the customer is not right, then return to step 1". It's far better to come to a good solution that you can both be satisfied with than it is to get one over on the customer, or just cave in to a customer if she or he is being unreasonable.

Warnings

1. Don't be a doormat. There is a big difference between helping a customer and allowing a customer to walk all over you. Set your boundaries early, and be polite but firm.
2. Don't be condescending. Nothing can escalate a situation faster than an employee who seems rude or mocking. Speak in a polite, yet genuine tone.
3. Get help if you are out of your depth. Get your manager, or call your boss, if you're all alone. Don't keep on floundering - you'll only aggravate an already tense situation.
4. Avoid your temptation to respond before fully listening to the customer and be sure to stay away from 'your' solution to the problem. After listening fully have the strength and courage to hold silence after you've asked the critical question compassionately, "So what do you want?" My twenty-five years of business experience has found that 95% of the people just wanted to be heard. The other four per cent have solutions much smaller than I thought they deserved. The remaining one per cent who were unreasonable, I just gave into holding positive thoughts from those who should have asked for more. Remember, in almost all negotiations, the one who offers solutions first almost always loses.